A Swift Way to Reduce the Deficit

I have seen the Simpson-Bowles report outline ways to solve the budget woes of the United States.  But I agree with Kevin Drum; it is clear that the real fiscal issue facing the US is in Medicare.  It is this single program that has proved most difficult to contain costs within.

But I think I have a solution that can win bipartisan support on Capitol Hill and insure the solvency of the federal government for decades.  And what’s more, it will not involve any increases in the top tiers of the income tax, capital gains tax or inheritance tax!

The solution?  Co-pays!  Not your usual co-pay where you pay $25 for the privilege of Dr. Jellyfinger to pummel your prostate.  No, this is more ingenious and more fiscally sound. 

Everyone over the age of 75 should have to make a co-pay in order to keep their Social Security and their Medicare.  I’m thinking about $10,000 a year should suffice.  The large co-pay would then go back into Medicare so that it retains a steady revenue stream.

But that’s not where the savings really come in.  Obviously, there are certain poorer Americans who will be unable to make such a large co-pay in order to remain part of Medicare.  As a result they will lose their Medicare and Social Security.  And when these Revenue Deficient Americans are no longer drawing from Social Security and Medicare, we will see REAL cost savings. 

Some bleeding hearts may point out that programs like Medicare and Social Security are MOST important to those without vibrant 401Ks, pension plans or huge vesting stock options.  But can’t you see that this is precisely the point? 

Let’s just call it like it is.  Revenue Deficient Americans aren’t REAL Americans.  Most of them aren’t even white.  I can’t imagine any of them ever engineered an IPO for a .Com in the ‘90s or created a credit default swap or outsourced jobs to a sweat shop in Malaysia.  In other words, none of them really contributed to American when they were alive…Um, young.  If those waitresses and fry cooks had been smart, they would have planned ahead and created a viable retirement plan, rather than depending on the 300 million teated cow.

Also for this reason, it seems obvious that retirees with certain higher levels of wealth should be exempted from having to pay the $10,000 co-pay.  To winners go the spoils, after all, and to punish them by taking away their money is un-American.  The $10 grand that Charles Koch keeps will help him to employ another piss boy at his fourth home.  Trickle down!

I want to be clear I’m not proposing euthanizing everyone over 75 who can’t make the $10,000 co-pay.  I think we should only euthanize them when they reach the age of 85.  But it’s clear that we should stop people from expecting things from their government.  Grover Cleveland said that “The people should support the government; the government should not support the people.”  And that is why he’s on Mt. Rushmore.